One day I went shopping at Costco and brought my son along. I knew he liked the pizza there so I asked him if I bought him a pizza would he eat it all week until it was finished. Of course he had a big smile and said yes. So I bought him one. Later in the day he started to misbehave so I said to him, “I guess you don’t want the pizza.” My expectation was that he would say, “Yes I do.” and act a little better. Well, he didn’t say what I expected him to say, he said, “I don’t want it.” I then said, “If you don’t want it, then I’ll eat the rest of the pizza by myself and I like pizza.” My expectation here was that he would say he wanted it. Instead he said, “Sure dad, you can have it.” I then realized I had backed myself into a corner.

We both suffered. I was not looking forward to eating all that pizza. Don’t get me wrong, I like pizza, but I didn’t need the calories. In practicing Dhamma, we are taught that for every action there is a consequence and we are taught about impermanence or “expect the unexpected and when it happens, don’t be surprised.” I remember, telling stories of people I know whose plans backfired on them. Well that just happened to me. I backed myself into a corner and couldn’t back out of eating the pizza. I’ve backed myself into a corner many times before, but this time it was different. I now saw my mistake. I now saw that I was “that guy” who I spoke about whose plan had backfired. AND I also felt bad. Before practicing Dhamma, I would have been angry at my son for making me eat all that pizza.

Later that day, I had talk with my son. He told me that he did want the pizza, but he was mad when I asked him the question about “not wanting to eat the pizza”, so he said he didn’t want it. After he calmed down, he regretted what he said. I was happy that he actually understood what he had done, like I had, and we both learned something. It is amazing watching is mind grow as well as mine.

After our talk, I told him he could have the rest of the pizza and told him I like pizza, but didn’t want to eat it because it was not good for me.