In one of the Dhamma classes broadcasted by Wat San Fran Dhammaram, I listened to the story of Prince Siddhartha and his love for his wife, Yashodara. There was no doubt that Yasodhara was the perfect wife for Prince Siddhartha. They had been together for so many lifetime. There was no other human being more suitable for Yashodara but Prince Siddhartha.

There were many reasons why they should be together: both were perfect human beings. Both of them had gone through countless lifetimes together in many shapes and forms. Both of them were predicted by the previous Buddha to be with one another until he became the Buddha. Both were born at relatively the same time, in the same era. They deserved each other.

However, do I ever stop and think what would happen if Prince Siddharta chose to be with Yashodara all his life? Sure they deserved each other, but at what cost? Do I ever think about the consequences? He had gone through countless lifetimes, perfecting all the ten qualities (Paramitta), went through a lost of troubles, sadness, happiness, sufferings, joy, separation, and stress of being reborn so many times. And in this last life, He was about to become the Buddha, His ultimate and final goal. He was almost at the finish line!

If He thought that He deserved a break and considered to just come home to his wife and His kingdom during His final days before enlightenment… is it really worth it? I don’t think so.

This made me think about my life.

One day, I did a long walk following the monks doing alms round. After it was finished and made it back to the temple, I was so tired. In the afternoon, one monk asked me to join the afternoon walk around the neighborhood. Three hours into the afternoon walk, We were on our way back to the temple. I started to think that I really deserved a rest. I went through a lot of miles already. A reward would be nice, especially when the temple was only couple more blocks. It would not be a big deal if I stopped walking and rest for few minutes.

As I re-evaluated the situation, was it really not a big deal? I only see what was in front of me – the “couple more blocks”. However, did I ever think about how far I went through to get to that point? How many blocks have I went through? How much effort, time, energy and money I have spent to get to that point? Now that it was only a couple more blocks… and I wanted to stop and take a rest? Was a few-minute rest really worth it? Did I really deserve the rest? Why couldn’t I push myself a bit more to finish that walk and rest afterwards? I was almost at the goal line, why not finish it… and finish it strong.

There are many occasions where I thought I deserved a break. But in reality, few minute rest, few bites of cakes, few slurps of sodas or few episodes of TV series is not worth the effort that I have put in to get me to that point. It was like the many videos – here, here and here – I saw on YouTube where athletes celebrated early when they thought they have won it, but in the end… they jeopardized their final victories just because they thought they deserved a bit of comfort.

I am no different than those athletes. And understanding the costs of what small comfort can lead to, it motivates me to just keep going on the tasks that I am doing until they are finished. I am practicing to start what I have to do and finish what I started.