In our first installment of How To “Do” we will be discussing being honest.

In my experience in order to be successful in this practice and in life for that matter I have to be able to be honest. I don’t mean just not lying to people, stealing and cheating. I mean being honest with what’s wrong with my perceptions, where am I being dishonest with myself. I have to be able to be honest with myself. I have to be able to be honest with other people about what I’m thinking and feeling. I have to be able to admit when I’m wrong. If I’m unable to be honest and admit I am wrong, I am unable to see the truth and unable to grow.

One tool I found very helpful to begin this journey of being honest admitting was the first assignment given to me by Phra Anun back in 2010. That assignment- keeping a list of each time I was wrong, each day. I mostly used the notepad on my phone to keep track. Here is a screen shot from my phone of some actual examples from that first assignment:

What I would like to point out is the last bullet point on 072310 where I wrote “Because of the sign  assumed I was at the right place.” This is what Im talking about when I say be honest with ourselves. With this tool we focus on our decisions, our perceptions instead of focusing on the sign per say. I assumed something about the sign, took actions based on that assumption, based on the outcome of those actions I was wrong NOT the sign. Another example can be looking up when a bus is scheduled to arrive. The schedule says the bus will be here at 10am. I believe the schedule to be correct. When the bus does not show up at 10am I am wrong NOT the schedule. I chose to believe the schedule. Now the sign, or schedule or what not could technically be wrong but we do not care about that with this tool. It is irrelevant. We are solely focusing on our perceptions, where we were wrong.

As stated this tool not only gave me perspective on my wrong perceptions but has allowed me to be able to admit I am wrong. Being able to admit I am wrong has been very useful in defusing situations, building bridges, reducing my ego and many other aspects of my life. I have probably gained more from this tool than any other and it built the foundation for the rest of my practice.

Give it a try. Keep track of when and where you are wrong for at least a week and leave a comment with some examples and what you learned!