On Standards
Last night we stayed at a hotel that was super dirty. The sheets were stained, there was hair everywhere, a peek in the kitchen revealed all kinds of creepy crawlies, the toilet was brown, as was the faucet water. It stank. I was soooo very uncomfortable. As I lay in my bed, I had no choice, no where else to go so I tried to fall asleep. I realized that there is a difference between ignoring the dirty and seeing it for what it is and accepting it when there really is no other way out.
Today we checked into another hotel. It too is modest, way below my normal standards, but it is clean. Just walking in the room filled my heart with comfort and joy. Compared to last night it is heaven even though at home I would never ever stay at a place like this, it is so below my standards.
From this I see the trap –the way I keep being able to stay in this world filled with things that disgust me, the way I get reborn; Little changes can give me hope, reset my standards, blind me to the terrible parts of life. All I need is something a little better than before and I can accept. But the downside, even a little worse than before and I feel loss.
More on Disgust
Disgust is a symptom of a wrong view. It is the desire to see only one side (the clean and orderly side), one state. But can anyone really be neutral? Can anyone really walk into a room at the hotel from 2 nights ago and be ok? What about folks who have never even stayed in a hotel before? Folks who sleep in shacks. They would likely find the room, with beds and sheets and running water a wonderful place. Our #3, memory, is what sets the standard.